OMG. Just when I thought it couldn't get any worse! When I was erected here just a few weeks ago I remember sensing a burning smell. I didn't take much notice then. I thought it was lard-ass playing with that chiminea thing.
Now I know the truth!
I AM NOT THE FIRST BLUE SHED ON THIS SITE!!! (See photo and note incinerator in foreground.)
Barely two weeks before I arrived there stood another Shed that had once been Blue and had been allowed to rot away, lock ripped off, window smashed and roof ripped off in the wind.
So lard-ass tore it down and burnt it. Seems he had an accident with it a few years ago when he leaned against it and put his hand through the window. Bled like a pig. He probably bore a grudge ever after. Serves him right.
Seen the scars on his left arm. Looks like the suturing was done by some cowboy of a House Officer first day on the job using parcel string.
Anyway, he got his revenge. My Once-Blue Sister-Shed ended up in the incinerator with neighbours complaining as per usual.
What a tragic end for a once-faithful servant. I can see I will have to watch my step here! He already stores his paraffin inside me.
He's had his car valeted for the holidays. About bloody time. It's a right bloody Shed*!
Anyway, his poncey friends have really pissed him off. They have announced that they are installing a custom-built summer-house with perspex roof and a veranda. All he has is a 6' x 4' pentland.
* PS, I do not approve of scruffy/dirty cars being referred to as Sheds. How insulting is THAT???
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